Sickness

The story holds true! I am, in fact, still alive!!

This is much to my surprise because I thought FOR SURE that what I was experiencing last week was the throws of death, or maybe the 5th circle of hell. Either way, I was positive that it was the end for me. Never have I been so miserable. I didn't know temperatures went that high without you convulsing and talking to pink elephants. My elephant was blue and named James incase you're curious.

I knew I was sick, and hind sight being twenty-twenty, I thought I just needed to rest and hydrate. Only I couldn't hydrate and things spiraled. Blah. I'll spare you the details. I made it out though, and 11 days later I'm still trying to rehydrate. Why can't hellmart offer an IV center?

What's more, I HAVEN'T HAD MILK IN 11 DAYS!

People! This is serious! Milk is my elixir for life. I drink it all day, everyday. Milk priced just dropped .20 cents and I haven't taken advantage!! I feel like I don't know who I am. What will I do with all these bottles of chocolate syrup? Am I really going to drink water and tea like some kind of adult?! I whipped up a glass of delicious chocolate milk yesterday morning and nothing, I couldn't get a sip down.

Furthermore, I ventured out today to lunch with the ladies and we rant into some friends. Their talk was all about how sickly I looked. How much weight I've lost and how my appearance seems gaunt. Fantastic. Can I get a hoagie? Here I was thrilled that there wasn't vomit in my hair and my kidneys weren't crying...

But life goes on right? The ladies have to know that there will once again be family dinner, and that fruit snacks are not a food group. They will be reminded that there is a schedule, rules to be followed, and parents to be respects instead of these sickly, gray creatures who settle them with granola bars and ipads. Most of all, I need to pick up where I left off two weeks ago before this house falls to pieces! If I don't get a new dishwasher my marriage may fail!!

Thirsty Thursday

I wish!

I kicked this stomach bug to pick up a cold. Fan-freakin-tastic! But I have support! Emma is sick with me. I loathe snotty kids. It just drips down their face and they ignore it till it reaches the lip then they wipe. Not wipe it off, but wipe it in, with their hand. Like it's moisturizer! WTH? Gross. There isn't enough sanitizer in the world to save this house.

Another annoying bit about sick kids, incase you forgot, is they're not big on peaceful sleeping. It's hell to get them to sleep, hell to keep them asleep, and it's hell when they wake up unrested. Sick kids are hell. Sick kids are hell-i-er if you are also sick. This is hell.

Ok so maybe it's not the end of the world, in fact it seems like just a passing cold luckily. That doesn't make me anymore thrilled to deal with it. I'm on the verge of actually feeling sick. I am kinda out of energy, kinda out of patience, and kinda not in the mood to deal with life right now. Apparently life doesn't like my plans for it!

I started to change the bed and the girls flipped out. Who knew king size mattresses were so scary! Maybe it was the sounds coming from their mother as she tried to throw said mattress around. I settled them and went back to changing the bed and though that today would be a good day to permanently attach the slats to the frame with everyone being sick and cranky. Yeah. Not so much. They totally geeked so we went to sit and read a book in their room, away from the scary bed and crazy drill. Then it was diaper, crib, ZZzzzzZZzzzzZZzzzz. Score!! Back to my bed project when the drill dies half way through! Bastard! This house is revolting against me! So I look up in disgust to see the cat climbing up my mattress which is sitting against the wall. His waif of a body was just enough to pull it down. Thud.

*Cue bad words*

*Cue more bad words*

That's how I ended up here, blogging. What did I intend on blogging about today? How I finally finished my bed! I want to tell everyone about MIL's party and the annoying beeping in the neighborhood.

MIL's party I somehow started planning. But thinks grew out of control because I can't say no. Family is so complicated, especially when it's not your own. What went from dinner with the in-laws and us has turned into a large family dinner. Oh and SIL who is too busy to plan a dinner for her own mother invited BIL and his daughter and family. I blame myself for being vague and not saying no. So our party of 6 crept up to 7, then 10, and I think has finally settled at 15. You know, a small family dinner! Don't worry, I got this!!

Then there is the issue of the beeping. Last night this beeping started. I have no idea what it is. It's not coming from our house. I think it sounds like a fire alarm going off. Three loud beeps then a pause. Repeated over and over and over. Of course it's hellaciously loud at night when there is nothing to drowned it out while you're trying to sleep. If it was someone's house burning down it should definitely be a pile of ash. If someone left their truck in reverse, the battery should be dead by now. We can't figure out what this is, where it is coming from, or how to even begin to address it. By we I mean me since I seem to be the only one really bothered by it. I would love to call the police department and sound like the local crackhead to tell them the neighborhood is beeping and ask if they could come investigate.

It's now 11:15 on a rainy Thursday morning. I am laughing at the forecast calling for snow this weekend, just in time for MIL's dinner. It's the end of March, enough with the snow already. Emma is whining in her sleep, most likely because she can't breathe. My head is hurting, my comforter is washing, my drill battery is charging and I think my wallet and I are going to do some online retail therapy!

Hope your Thursday is just as enjoyable!

Learning to Follow Through

This has always been a downfall of mine. I never follow through. There is always one thing left on my to-do list at the end of the day, I leave projects "done-enough" and general I tend to half-ass things. Today I'm not following through with this week's project because of exhibits A & B.

Exhibit A: The Sick Baby

Hot and Pukey in Bawlmer (which you totally won't get unless you live here)!

Exhibit B: The Ene.rgizer Bunny

Who continually demands we read Pony Brushes His Teeth! Enough already, we got, he brushed his damn teeth!

See, that's an excuse and I like to make lots of those! It used to be I worked 50 hours a week and went to school full time. Then it was the whole I'm too depressed doing IVF. That changed to the whole I'm pregnant and stuck in bed fiasco. Now I like to use the babies and hubs as my excuse, cause they take up all my time playing farm and leaving messes. Do you make excuses too? Please tell me I'm not alone...

What bothers me most is when I do start to accomplish things DH tell's me I've done too much! WHAT?! I'm just getting started! Being a parent and a homeowner are two never ending jobs. So how do you balance? (This is where Marcia chimes in... :)) I think I've found a plan.

I've started setting weekly goals on top of my maid/chef/vet/child-rearing expert duties. I set my time limit for one week, so that hopefully it will get done in two! This week's goals were to patch and paint the walls. It's now friday and I am proud to say I've patched! Of course I now need to clean from all the dust, and as I clean I have to tend to the children, and make lunch, and let the dogs out, and tend to the children playing with the dogs, and so on and so forth. I would like to say F*CK YOU house for being old and having plaster walls that I am too cheap and lazy to rip out and actually replace! (and yes I do my own household repair because I am that cheap and lazy) I think part of my problem maybe that I am too much of a perfectionist. I couldn't just spackle the walls, I had to make sure they were perfectly sanded, smooth, and ready for paint lest someone notices that behind my couch the wall was repaired!

I know some of you stay home, others have people that come in, and still others of you attempt to actually work (CRAZY! I think I'd explode!) real jobs with other adults in places full of professionalism and structure and corporate policy!Scary stuff...

So how do you find balance and what are you standards? I just need to know I'm not crazy...yet.

Home Sick

Do you see this?? Do you see it??

I was sooooooooo excited to take this picture. It was taken in January of 2009 and I was convinced I was starting to get my "belly"! It was probably just bloated still but I was thrilled none the less! Looking back I don't even see the baby belly I was so thrilled over, and I would love to have that tummy back! Taunt, tight, ripped...all those years of sports and running. Now it looks like, well, lets not go there. I used to make fun of people who have the belly I have now. What I wouldn't give for a little nip-tuck of my own!

Chin up, I have two little excuses for my flab now. Today I stomped into patient first for my sore throat and was a bit underwhelmed to be weighted. Do they really need to know how much I way to figure out why my throat is sore? Is there some sort of correlation there that I am missing? 127.6 lbs. HOO-freakin-RAY! Somewhere I dropped 10 lbs! Suddenly my throat didn't hurt so much!!! Then the lovely nurse-y repeatedly asked me if there was any possibility if I were pregnant. Repeatedly. Gave me a chart to point out my last period. I was really hoping she'd make me pee in a cup, because if it had gone that far I would have gladly recapped the last 5 years for as I handed her my nice, warm cup of piss. Really lady, no shot there, trust me. On top of IF I have twins so any remote possibility of pregnancy after IF just died there!

Before I headed out I asked Dr. Goo.gle what was wrong with me and the good doc said tonsillitis. Throat culture said no to strep, I was diagnosed with tonsillitis, given my meds and out the door in 20 minutes. Tonsillitis is such a kid ailment. What adult misses work for tonsillitis? Do you ever remember your parents getting sick? I swear my parents were never sick, meanwhile I feel like a 5 year old and just want to cuddle with my pillow. Thank you Patient First for your efficiency!

Patient First, my doc in a box! I love it! The only thing that would be better would be a vending machine for antibiotics. I do have a good reason for not going to my gp. She sucks. No that's means, she more like a part-time doctor. She is never in the office! Fantastic! Thanks for being there! I still remember the sheer embarrassment I felt over explaining, in detail, what IVF was and why I needed it and a referral to the lovely nurses at the front desk for the entire waiting room to hear! The same ladies who told me I should go to the emergency room for a UTI. I really need to get a new doc, stat. Does anyone else have a quack doctor? I would love to have my peri or RE as my family practice doctor. I'd gladly pay their fees just to get my amoxicillin.

So tomorrow back to work, should have waited and taken tomorrow off. Then Sunday we are canning at my Aunt Bev's! This weekend we are canning 50 lbs of pickles! Sweet pickles, bread and butter, and dill. I think she is dropping garlic this year because no one ever eats them. Later we'll do applesauce, tomatoes, veggies, and some more jams. I love homemade goods, I'll have to take pictures. Hope everyone has a good weekend!